I play poker with a couple of guys in the neighborhood. Ten bucks in and you too can be the winner of, uh, seventy bucks. We have been doing this for a bit. Fun stuff. Most recently, I did and thought what many do when you fold. You second guess. You think too much about what may have happened in the hand you folded. I could have had a straight flush or some type of magical ace-high two pair or full house that would make you the star…at least for that hand. What about life? What about management?
Managing others digs deep into the “what if” so very often. My first book looked squarely at that concept. It stretches you into the mindset of “if only I had done this or that and I would have got or been given ‘x’. Or something like that.” I realize it has been a while since I blogged. I own that. I wish I would have blogged more. And if I had, something different would have happened in my life? More hits, maybe. Maybe, a multi-millionaire would have read that most recent post and I would be liquid. How about this; life happens and you just missed on that royal flush. And then it is Wednesday. And your daughter looked you in the eye and said “Daddy, I love you.” What exactly do you lament over? Did you not get that promotion? Do you not have the Range Rover by age 35? Do you not have that certain widget?
What am I saying? OK, I am a teacher of managers and have lived from Pong to Call of Duty. Faxing a document was cool in my lifetime and now everyone is “tweeting” another person. Can you imagine not having that ability? Really? What are you grieving or saddened about your job? Put it into perspective. I know individuals who no longer have a job. They lament. I know others who have lost their homes. They lament. And I could have had a flush. Where do I factor?
Let’s say I have a team of five and they have a new sales target. I have a meeting to set the stage and do not hit that one thing I know I should have. Maybe it was a story or analogy. Maybe it is a topic from the owner. Maybe it is just as simple as letting the team know “that you believe in them”. Or maybe, it was getting so caught in your management job, you forgot to lead the team into their sales target. Whatever it may be, forget the regret thing. Do not lament. Move and embrace. Act now. Be proactive, if you can. Be reactive, if you have to.
Regrets are a part of life. Which means they are also part of management. Which also means they are part of how you embrace the tasks on your plate. People and tasks. Everyone falls down. They also get up. Your call. I didn’t get the flush. I could have. I could have also taken a job in Italy and never had my daughters Grace and Sarah. I can always do better. So can you. The measure of my life, of my abilities are not stuffed into a 3 by 5 box in the corner on Wednesday. It is and will always be how I learn and move on. Managers, you will fall down. You will fail. You will not hit the mark. And you will also not fall down, succeed and absolutely hit the mark. What and how will you lament? Stick and move. Seriously.
I did not win that poker night. In fact, I have never won. And I still show up. Ten dollars in. And a chance to laugh at others and myself (especially at myself). A chance at seventy bucks. Really? Yes. That is just the money you win. The experience – priceless. I’ve heard that somewhere.
Cheers